Oh, Meryl
Sometimes I know you’ve said you wished you were sterile
And you always thought my thoughts were puerile
I must’ve turned out your version of feral
And you always feared I was in some sort of trouble;
Oh Meryl, now that you’re the one in peril,
So sorry to burst your geriatric bubble,
Now that you’re the one in my care,
Now that all that’s left is a vacant stare,
Well, this is where I really get into trouble,
Coz I tried my hardest while you were still nearly there,
I tried as hard as I would ever dare,
But sad to say,
Things went completely astray
And it looks like it’s come the day
Where I have to go back to Life’s play;
You got me thinking you were a bitch and a witch
You thought I was a snitch unhitched
This has left us both by each other corrupted
And I’m sad this is how it’s erupted;
We could blame the hospital, your dumb doctor
All I wanted to be was your fucking proctor;
But the truth is, my view on the tender gender
Has struggled, since for you I was always on a bender;
So your care for now I’ll have to be a lender
And mail you back ‘return to sender’
To my exemplary ex-wife
She’ll do her best to sort your strife
She was always way too good for me
The outcome this time, we’ll have to wait and see
But please remember, I tend to write in a bit of a fit
And poetic license might make me seem a filial heretic.